O that you were like a brother to me: the opening words in Hebrew express a longing or wish. The expression is usually translated “Oh, that…” in Revised Standard Version and is found often in Job (6.8; 11.5; 13.5; 14.4, 13) and occasionally in Psalms (53.6; 55.6). The translator may be able to find an idiomatic expression for this notion, or we can simply say “If only…” or “I wish that you were….” Note that in English the phrase “wish that you were…” is used to show that the young man is not actually her brother. In many languages there are special verb forms that must be used to communicate a wish that things were different than they actually are.

Like a brother to me: the significance of this brother-sister relationship comes out in the following half of the verse, and so it must be taken into account in determining the sense here. Some commentators see a possible Canaanite influence in this passage, with the brother and sister representing the god and goddess of fertility. However, in this setting in which the two lovers merely speak to each other, such a view does not seem appropriate. The scene is one in which the two lovers are enjoying one another out in the fields away from public view because their relationship is still secret. The young woman wishes they did not have to meet so secretly. If only they could meet openly and seem like brother and sister, then she would be even happier than she is now.

Her wish that he were like a brother clearly does not mean that she would like him to treat her as a real sister, or that their relationship might be that of actual brother and sister. Her real longing is for their relationship to be publicly acceptable. Therefore those translations that speak in literal terms of a brother-sister relationship, like Good News Translation (“I wish you were my brother”), Jerusalem Bible, New American Bible, New English Bible, may be misleading, even suggesting incest. We catch her sense with a translation like “If only you could be seen with me, like a brother could” or “If only you could be with me openly, like a brother could.”

That nursed at my mother’s breast is a phrase modifying brother, a son of her own mother. The point is clear; a brother belongs in the same intimate family setting. Since the two are still secret lovers, she longs for the time when, like brother and sister, they can be together naturally and with the family’s blessing.

The mention of “nursing,” that is, breast-feeding, may present a difficulty for translation in some languages. Views about breast-feeding vary from culture to culture. In most contexts a literal translation of the Hebrew, “one who nursed at my mother’s breast,” will be perfectly acceptable, while in others it may be offensive or may not fit in with the general tone of the Song. If this is the case we can substitute other expressions, such as “raised by the same mother,” “one who was born and raised in the same family,” or “one my own mother fed and raised.”

If I met you: this clause can be rendered as a conditional, If …, or as a time clause, “Whenever I met you….” The young woman is imagining something that could possibly happen. In literary English we may say “Were I to meet you” or “Should I meet you.” The verb is actually “find,” the same keyword we have seen throughout the Song, but especially in the dream scenes (3.1-6; 5.6). When the watchmen “find” the young woman, however, the sense is more “come upon” or even “see,” as though it were a chance meeting. It is hard to know which meaning is intended here. If we decide the woman is actually searching for her lover, we can say “Whenever I come to meet you.” However, many translations are ambiguous: “if I found you outside…” (New International Version); “if I met you out of doors…” (Jerusalem Bible). Since the verb seems to be ambiguous in Hebrew, either interpretation can be adopted. An ambiguous expression such as Jerusalem Bible above will be quite acceptable, but trying to preserve the key verb “find” is important as well.

Though many translations add the conditional marker If at this point, the real condition is contained in the previous phrase, “If only you were my brother, then….” Several versions make this logical relationship clearer by including “then” before the conditional marker; thus “Then, if I met you in the street…” (Good News Translation). We can also say “Then if I were to meet you….” New Jerusalem Bible is similar, though it makes this clause (If I met you) a subordinate clause and places it after the main clause, I would kiss you …. This rearrangement makes the logical relationship between the clauses very clear:
Then I could kiss you
When [If] I met you in the street.

Outside or “in the street” (Good News Translation) has the wider sense of “openly,” “in public.” Thus New American Bible and New English Bible “out of doors” is rather weak, since it includes places like the fields, where no one would see them. The young woman wishes they could meet openly rather than secretly as at present, away from where people can see them.

I would kiss you or Good News Translation “I could…” indicates the new possibility. If only they could openly be lovers, such behavior would be acceptable. On kiss see comments on 1.2. The Hebrew word can also describe one object touching another, or in contact with another; but in this setting kiss is probably the best term to use. However, if kissing in public is not appropriate behavior between brothers and sisters, then this passage will not be understood. In that case we can either put the explanation in a footnote or use a more general expression, “be close to you” or “show you that I love you.”

None would despise me indicates that the young woman would not be breaking Hebrew cultural or social rules or doing something that would cause her and her family to lose face. Despise, or “reproach, scorn,” indicates how people feel about unacceptable behavior. Jerusalem Bible offers “without people thinking ill of me.” Good News Translation suggests “no one would mind,” but this is rather weak. In some contexts the public display of affection, which breaks accepted rules, is punishable under the law, so we may need to use quite a strong word.

Translation possibilities for these clauses are:

• I could touch you and there would be nothing wrong with it.

• I could show you how much I love you and no one would be offended.

• I could kiss you openly and it would not be wrong.

The whole verse can then say:

• If only you were my brother,
a member of my very own family,
Then I could kiss you in the open,
And no one would condemn me!

Quoted with permission from Ogden, Graham S. and Zogbo, Lynell. A Handbook on the Book of Song of Songs. (UBS Helps for Translators). New York: UBS, 1998. For this and other handbooks for translators see here .